Life right now

I'm needing a little therapy right now. 98% of those of you reading this should probably move on to the next blog. This entry will not be cute, nor will it contain fun pictures. I should be going to bed. I'm exhausted. I have strep throat. I'm supposed to be getting up early, and the odds of me getting a good night's sleep tonight are slim to none. But I need a little therapy.

This week has been....not sure what word to use. I over use the word crazy. And I probably over use the word insane too. 'Busy' doesn't capture it. So, I'm not sure what word to use.

I have been grieving. I've probably grieved more than what is 'appropriate' for my relationship to the situation. But who decides that kind of thing? It doesn't matter really. The point is, I've been terribly sad. And grieving is very draining--emotionally and physically.

And then I had my women's small group, Potter's Clay this week. Blessing + Responsibility #1. Then I had a MOPS trip to Houston to see Beth Moore. I am a MOPS table leader this year, which is awesome, but another Blessing + Responsibility #2. This trip was a great point of renewal this week though. It was stressful organizing it, but I enjoyed it.

Then I got strep throat. Total bummer, but mild compared to life's ailments. It's just been frustrating to not be 100% while trying to take care of so many other things. Basically, I just don't have time to be sick. (that sounds so arrogant and pretentious....i don't mean it that way)

Then I had a MOPS meeting this morning, which I, of course, had to bring baked goods to. And then we had dance class. And then another flag football game. And now I am REALLY behind on preparing for mine and Dawson's 2nd Pre-marital Class tomorrow night (Blessing + Responsibility #3).

Of course, while this is all being juggled, I'm also training for a 5K. Yes, that's right....me.....running a 5K. Crazy, right?? NEVER did I imagine I could do something like this. But I haven't done it yet....still 2 more weeks of training to go. Another entry will be done solely about this adventure, I'm sure.

Plus, Adelyn is not sleeping well these days. And Ellie ends up in our bed most nights too. And our finances are a wreck, which of course, is so, so stressful. I HATE MONEY! Puke. Yuck. Gag me with a spoon.

Oh--and we are having a garage sale on Saturday. So, that'll be ridiculous....trying to get ready for that tomorrow, after we are done teaching our class! And then after the garage sale, we are supposed to drive out to Somerville to meet my parents and put on our happy faces to celebrate my Dad's birthday with them. AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! Oddly, typing that does make me feel a little better. :)

Truthfully, instead of whining, I should be making a list of blessings. I have leaned on God hard this week. And He has been speaking some wonderful things to my heart. He keeps reminding me that our contentment and joy is mostly a matter of perspective. And even though I feel tired and overwhelmed by my life right now, I wouldn't have it any other way. My blessings don't just overflow my cup. They flood my life.

I am chin deep in a pool of blessings. I just need to stop frantically doggy-paddling, and just float. And breathe. Thank you God. Good therapy.

Heaven

I've cried more than a dozen times today. My heart hurts very deeply. It is because a precious, beautiful baby girl left this earth yesterday. Her name is Jordan. This is her.

Isn't she absolutely beautiful? I never had the privilege of physically meeting Jordan. But her sweet mother, Kristen, and I grew up together. She was a very good friend of mine. And still is. Even though I never got to hug her, or spend time with her, I feel like I knew Jordan from Kristen's emails, blog entries and facebook posts about her. I got to see her grow and change through all of her beautiful pictures, and keep up with her little life.

Jordan fought a form of cancer called Neuroblastoma for about a year. She braved many chemotherapy and radiation treatments, and endured a lot of trials. This sweet child was prayed for by probably thousands of people. And throughout the whole process, I was sure God was going to cure her, if for no other reason but that His glory could be known to so many. But... He didn't.

I know God well enough to know that He can handle my doubts and my anger. And I've been angry with Him over Jordan several times. I've asked Him lots of questions too......like why did she have to get cancer? Why a sweet, innocent baby? Why her? And why does Kristen have to lose the one precious child she's been given, and I still get to keep all three of mine? I know that it's not God's perfect will that anyone should suffer, but that the sin of this world manifests itself in many different terrible ways. And we also know God does intervene and provide miracles sometimes.....why not this time???

He hasn't answered all of my questions. But yesterday, He granted me some peace and perspective. He reminded me of something very important to the issue...... that this life...this painful world is not our destination. Even though, as humans, we value this lifetime so much and try to squeeze out every last minute we can, as believers, we have to remember that this earth is not our home. Our lives and souls are eternal. And our time on earth, whether 20 months or 92 years, is only a speck on the time line; a blip on the radar screen. Maybe not even that....

Jordan has simply beat us to the finish line. Her race was short, but no less meaningful. God used her in so many wonderful ways, and now she is enjoying her prize. I'm sure it was quite a celebration when the angels welcomed her home. And ultimately, Kristen will not just have these 20 short months with her, but she will get to spend an eternity with her, in the most perfect place.

Please pray alongside me for Kristen and Craig Plauschinat. May God be their comfort and strength....until the day when they are reunited with their their beautiful daughter.

Golden Gator....x 2!

A friend and I were talking a couple weeks ago about the blessing of thinking your husband and your kids are the very best. I have always thought Dawson, Caleb, Ellie and Adelyn are the best of the best....the absolute cream of the crop! And I've hoped that all of my friends and loved ones think the very same thing about their husbands and kids. I think that is the way God intended for us to feel....incredibly proud of and grateful for the ones He's given us.

Specifically, Caleb Wayne Skow is a pretty awesome kid. He is kind, thoughtful, funny, affectionate, intelligent, caring and just an all-around cool guy. I'm not sure any one on earth thinks as highly of him as I do, but it's nice to know that others see a glimpse of what I do. On Wednesday, Caleb was honored with the "Golden Gator award" from his 1st grade teacher. The award is only given to two children in each class for each six-weeks. This is the second year in a row that Caleb has been chosen as a Golden Gator by his teachers during the first six weeks of the year. Apparently, he makes a good 1st impression!! :)

All in all, God gets the glory. He is the one who designed Caleb's little heart and personality. Dawson and I are just trying to keep from messing him up! :) Our prayer for Caleb has always been that God would mold his heart to be like Jesus's heart. Thank you, Father, for allowing me to be his mother and for the blessing he is to all of us!

Here are pictures from the proud day:

First Day of Mother's Day Out

I know that I haven't posted & memorialized Caleb's first day of FIRST GRADE yet (still can't believe my baby is in 1st grade?!) But those pictures were accidentally taken on the 'internal memory' of our camera, and I haven't quite figured out how to get them from there to here!

Ellie's first day of Mother's Day Out was last week. She is going only one day per week from 9:30-1:30pm. And I have to admit that I've had some issues reconciling sending her there. I mean, didn't I quit my job so I could stay at home with my children?! But while this is true, I'm realizing all the benefits to letting Ellie go to "school" for a few hours a week. 1-She LOVES it...mainly because it makes her feel like a big kid, like her Bubba. 2-I'm hoping for it to help her with obeying authority figures other than her parents....she struggles with this quite a bit :) 3-I think it'll be good for her socially as well. She is not a total extrovert, like her aforementioned brother. She tends to be more of a loner at times. Basically, she might just need a little more practice interacting with 'friends' and last, but not least 4- It does help me help her to be a little more exposed to the academic side of life....like numbers, letters, etc.

So, now that I feel better about justifying this new venture of ours...... :) Here are some picture of my MDO cutie!!

Love that face expression!

Loving her new lunchbox

Getting ready to go!
The motley crew in the morning...

Fun Questions

I stole this from another blog I sometimes read.....you are supposed to answer 8 questions, and then "tag" eight people to post the same questions and answer them. I know this is incredibly silly, but it's really late, so my 'mature' filter is barely working...if at all. So, just for fun.....

1. What brand of toilet paper do you use?
Whatever is on sale....

2. Who is the celebrity that you are most embarrassed to admit you have a crush on?
Taylor Lautner (had to google just to find out his name....but he's pretty hot....for a teenage werewolf! :)

3. What is your all time favorite movie?
White Christmas (with Annie and Parent Trap as a tie for 2nd!)

4. What store do you spend most of your paycheck?
The Mortgage/Bills store :/ But also Kroger or Wal-mart (used to be Target!)

5. What is your favorite restaurant?
Springhill Catfish Restaurant!!

6. What is your most favorite thing to do in the town you live in?
Other than hanging out with my family, it is going to a country dance hall....but I don't get to that very often anymore

7. Where is the best place you have been on vacation?
Estes Park on my honeymoon!

8. What is the most distant place you have visited?
San Francisco, CA for a teacher's conference

Now I'm supposed to tag 8 people.....Hmmm, who is going to read this?!....
Here it goes:
1. Missy Schrib
2. Katy Garner
3. Melissa Saunders
4. Becky Wilds
5. Kristen Plauschinat
6. Krista Burdine
7. Mandy Benedix
8. Sam Shields
Honorary 9th & 10th: Dani & Chris :)
(Jen, if you ever updated your crazy blog...I would've tagged you!?! :)

Have fun with it! Good night!

Things that I love (9-6-10 edition)

1. Having one-on-one time with my kids....getting to enjoy their personalities and have priceless, uninterrupted conversation
2. a clean house....and the peace that comes with it.
3. Sonic drinks....forever and ever, Amen.
4. Cooler weather...to be able to play outside and enjoy it
5. Seeing my parents love on my children...especially my Dad
6. Good books....right now, "Forgotten God" by Francis Chan
7. unbelievably awesome *** :)
8. working cars and phones!?!...ridiculous how dependent we are on these two things
9. listening to Adelyn "pray"....always wants her turn, but all I can make out is "amen"--absolutely precious!
10. when Dawson has the day off....love having him home with us!


The other day, Ellie and Dawson went on a "picnic date" and she just happened to perfectly match her 31 lunch tote. What great advertising!! :)

Back in Action

Incredibly abbreviated Summer 2010 review:

Visit to the Houston Aquarium with Memaw and Aunt Nette.....so Fun!

Camping at Lake Somerville!

Children's Museum in Ft. Worth...one of the coolest places I've ever been! Seriously!

Random Adventure to Huntsville on a day that we were bored! :)









And in between all these "adventures" , there's been lots of cuteness and fun just around the house....


More updates to come soon.....
about life in the new 'hood
and the beginning of 1st Grade!!