Heaven

I've cried more than a dozen times today. My heart hurts very deeply. It is because a precious, beautiful baby girl left this earth yesterday. Her name is Jordan. This is her.

Isn't she absolutely beautiful? I never had the privilege of physically meeting Jordan. But her sweet mother, Kristen, and I grew up together. She was a very good friend of mine. And still is. Even though I never got to hug her, or spend time with her, I feel like I knew Jordan from Kristen's emails, blog entries and facebook posts about her. I got to see her grow and change through all of her beautiful pictures, and keep up with her little life.

Jordan fought a form of cancer called Neuroblastoma for about a year. She braved many chemotherapy and radiation treatments, and endured a lot of trials. This sweet child was prayed for by probably thousands of people. And throughout the whole process, I was sure God was going to cure her, if for no other reason but that His glory could be known to so many. But... He didn't.

I know God well enough to know that He can handle my doubts and my anger. And I've been angry with Him over Jordan several times. I've asked Him lots of questions too......like why did she have to get cancer? Why a sweet, innocent baby? Why her? And why does Kristen have to lose the one precious child she's been given, and I still get to keep all three of mine? I know that it's not God's perfect will that anyone should suffer, but that the sin of this world manifests itself in many different terrible ways. And we also know God does intervene and provide miracles sometimes.....why not this time???

He hasn't answered all of my questions. But yesterday, He granted me some peace and perspective. He reminded me of something very important to the issue...... that this life...this painful world is not our destination. Even though, as humans, we value this lifetime so much and try to squeeze out every last minute we can, as believers, we have to remember that this earth is not our home. Our lives and souls are eternal. And our time on earth, whether 20 months or 92 years, is only a speck on the time line; a blip on the radar screen. Maybe not even that....

Jordan has simply beat us to the finish line. Her race was short, but no less meaningful. God used her in so many wonderful ways, and now she is enjoying her prize. I'm sure it was quite a celebration when the angels welcomed her home. And ultimately, Kristen will not just have these 20 short months with her, but she will get to spend an eternity with her, in the most perfect place.

Please pray alongside me for Kristen and Craig Plauschinat. May God be their comfort and strength....until the day when they are reunited with their their beautiful daughter.